Sunday, September 27, 2009

"Whoever does God's work gets God's Pay..."

"When filled with God's love, we can do and see and understand things that we could not otherwise do or see or understand. Filled with His love, we can endure pain, quell fear, forgive freely, avoid contention, renew strength, and bless and help others in ways surprising even to us." -John H. Groberg

You know what... it's true! The closer I am to God, and the more I'm able to feel His love, the simpler things seem. They just sort themselves out... or I understand more fully the part I should play. I love my God. I am grateful to be His daughter, and know He has a plan for me.

Right now the part of the plan I understand is that I am where I am suppose to be. I honestly believe that. I have met people that have touched my soul. I have grown... and am continuing to grow. The ward I'm in, the job I have... I'm where I am needed most. Now all I have to do is do WHAT God needs me to do! That's the hard part! ha ha... I do think that my prayers lately have been answered on that account too. I have a plan... and I feel good about that plan. I'm in the process of making a list to accomplish that plan.. but you know, I'm a list person... My best friend Amber asked me if I had made a list about a week ago.. I had to confess that I hadn't. How she knows me so well astounds me. I did need that... and other advise. I feel better having a plan and a list to accomplish those plans. I need to see my progression... I guess that's why I keep a journal too. I need to see the change in myself. I want to grow and change... that is the whole purpose of life isn't it.. to become a better person from day to day?! I know I have set backs... major setbacks sometimes... but in my heart I want to make myself something, and somehow I manage to remember that before things get to desperate. I can do it! Plans!
I have direction.. and I'm contributing! that's all I ask... to make a difference! :D

One person that has really influenced my life... who I will probably never be able to repay, (but to whom I will continually strive to repay) is my Aunt Gracie. I LOVE HER! I figure I owe her my soul! :D ha ha... I'm blessed. I definitely consider her my hero. I don't think she will ever know how much my life has changed and I have grown because of her influence in my life. I feel like my communication skill have benefited because of her... never letting me close off and bottle up my feelings. She loves me, and cares about who I am.. and who I am becoming. She's always been there... she's my example. I want to grow up to be like her. I don't think I could ever be quite as straight forward or outspoken about how I feel... but I would like to try. :D I have a wonderful family. I'm grateful that I was born into such a great legacy. I pray to be able to continue to live so that I may pass that legacy on... in one way or another.

"Legacy is passed from heart to heart."
-Pres. Henry B. Eyring

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

a tribute to all of my friends....

The last couple weeks have been full of interesting lessons for me. I have had the impression that It's time for me to pay tribute to all of the people that have contributed to who I am, and who I am becoming. To my friends... I'd name all the names, but there are more than I realized once I really sat and thought about it.

I fall in love with people easily. I use to think that this was one of my weaknesses, and maybe it was, but now I think I am becoming stronger and am a little more willing to love more freely and fully. It slowly is getting to the point where it doesn't hurt so much. If it does hurt it's the kind of hurt that comes with understanding and a knowledge of it's worth. And it is worth it!

I have been blessed throughout my life to meet people that have uplifted and built me up and I have grown because of it. Thank you!

I've done a lot of studying and reading about friendship and the importance we all play in each others lives. I want to share some of the thoughts that impacted me most.. and some of my own thoughts.

First some thoughts from Joseph Smith. He was probably one of the most charismatic people I know of. I think there were a lot of people who considered him a great friend. I believe that I would have been one of those people had I lived and met him during his life. Here is what he said about his friends, and friendship:
Of his friends: "They shall not want for a friend while I live."
- "I will Love those, and my hands shall toil for those who love and toil for me, and [I] shall ever be found faithful to my friends."
- "These I have met in prosperity, and they were my friends; and I now meet them in adversity, and they are still my warmer friends."
- "There are many souls whom I have loved stronger than death. To them I have proved faithful -to them I am determined to prove faithful, until God calls me to resign up my breath."
- "I don't care what a man's character is; if he's my friend -a true friend, I will be a friend to him, and preach the gospel of salvation to him and give him good counsel, helping him out of his difficulties."
- "That friendship, which intelligent beings would accept as sincere, must arise from love, and that love grows out of virtue, which is as much a part of religion as light is part of Jehovah. Hence the saying of Jesus, 'Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.' John 15:13
I pray to be a friend like this, and to continue to be blessed with such friends. :D

There is so much in my heart that I wish to say, but just can't find the words. I wish with all my heart to be and have the kind of friendships that last, endure, and truly are sincere and have meaning. I wish to be able to love others with all my heart and be there when they need someone. I know I have had so many friends who at certain points in my life have been that person for me. I believe that there are different levels of friendship... at least for me. My closest friends are family... if not literally I've adopted them into my family, and they know it. These are the friends who are most special to me, and will continue to be just as special for me for eternity. This circle of friends is smaller, and outside of family I only have a couple others in my life who fall into that category. They will always have a special place in my heart and will know of the love I have for them and the desire I have to do anything and all I can for them... because I do and will!

I also have many other friends who have touched me on another level, who I am just as loyal to, and love just as dearly. These friends have shown up much more constantly and frequently from many different circumstances. Every point in my life where there has been a need I have been blessed, from childhood friends, to seminary and institute teachers, to bishops, teachers, leaders and then to roommates. I have forged a special bond with each individual. I have had part of my life change for the better for every person I have been able to befriend and know a little bit more.
Each type of friend has been an answer to a prayer or many prayers at one point or another. I thank you all for being who you are, and for touching the lives of those around you. I LOVE YOU! Thank you for touching my life.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

"When you love a person you see the face of God" -Les Mis

I was driving to work early this morning rocking out to the soundtrack "Les Mis" and I was thinking to myself about how much I love this book and the Broadway production. It's incredible! I think the character I most relate with at this point in my life is Eponine. I won't expound on that too much... only to say, I feel like Eponine and wish I were Cosette. hmmm, oh well. Someday I will be.
On my way home I was listening and singing along with one of the songs when I just had to pause and think about what was being said... I really liked how when you love a person you see the face of God. I agree with that. I think that when a person loves someone they have the opportunity to grow and see others how God would see them. We can choose to see the face of God. I know that as I've loved people in my life I have grown, and I see in myself things I can do better. But I also see how much God loves me and those around me. It's an amazing opportunity. I hope I always choose to see the face of God, and not be afraid to love others.

Another thought... I've got to stop being a hermit. I've gotten so busy with work and the one class I'm taking. ... Oh and institute!
I guess more than anything though, is I just haven't had the desire to be very social. It was a lot easier when there was someone who encouraged me, consciously or unconsciously, to do things. Now I've got to go out and do it by myself. hmmm. I'm kinda scared about that.
I guess I can do it... I just have to forget for a second that I'm scared. I do know that I need to be a good friend. I've been asking Heavenly Father what I should do to be a better person... and so far all I'm getting is that He wants me to be a good friend. I'm not sure what that means exactly... but I'm trying. I don't always feel like I succeed, but trying is what matters....

I love Les Mis

Thursday, September 3, 2009

When it rains it POURS!

It's true! Everything has been so crazy lately. I've had to go back through my journal to remember everything that has happened.
JOLINES! Con tanto tiempo entre los anotaciones, he olividado mucho. Primeramente.. tengo un trabajo nuevo! esta bien.
(I probably should switch back to english, sorry!)
I finally found a job that wanted me! I am a pastry chef at Kneaders in Lehi. I get to make people fat! The joy and sole purpose of my life, I guess! :D ha ha ha! I love working there. I am learning a lot and am growing too. I love the people I work with. Especially TRISH and EMILY! I can't say how grateful I am that there are such people in the world. I'm getting faster at all of the many things I have to do, and am learning some spectacular recipes... too bad they are confidential... I even had to sign a little paper saying I wouldn't give them away! So no matter how much you ask I just can't and wont, but I might cook some stuff for you!
I do have to say that my first two weeks working were killer. I couldn't believe how intense it was to learn so much newness and try to be good at it all at the same time.. ha! And sooo much overtime, when I was only suppose to be part-time! It was a definate adventure for sure... flying brownie mix.... exploding mixers! You get the idea! BUT I LOVE IT!!!
Well, not only do I now have a job, but I had a crazy time figuring out whether or not to go back to school. Well, it's a good thing that God is so aware of me... I didn't really want to go back to school... but no matter how much I denied it.. I knew that I already had the answer He had given me several times. I was suppose to continue with my schooling. So, I am taking a class. One class.. ha ha! Math.. ick, my favorite subject of all time! So I talked to an academic counselor and figured everything out... I really think that as of now... I know what I'm going to do... and where I need to be. (I hope!)
I had the opportunity to go to the Oquirrh temple dedication. I went early in the morning because I was babysitting for my aunt so she, her husband, and her older children could go in the afternoon. The session I went to both Elder Uctdorf and Bednar spoke, and President Monson gave the dedicatory prayer. I love how the spirit can teach you, and in an abundance when you are prepared for it. I definately had some answers when Spencer V. Jones spoke. It's wonderful to know that God knows and cares about all the decisions and things I am trying to figure out.
All in all. I learned a lot this past month. I learned to breath fire, drive stick, how to say goodbye to good friends... again, (I'm not to good at that btw) I learned that when speaking in sacrament, and giving the sunday school lesson all in the same day... to prepare, prepare prepare!!!it is nice tho when it's the fifth sunday, so bishop takes second hour, giving me a break...that way the nauseousness can settle!... also, -to tie my shoes,(that's pretty important) -to make large batches of pumpkin bread, -to be a better friend, -how important it is to be a dependable friend, and how NOT-important other things are, and really how much God loves me. Life couldn't be better! (Okay, so some of these things I haven't quite learned TOTALLY, but give me some time eh! I'm still young!)

Here is one last thing I thought I would share that I learned today... I think it has really helped me lately, the whole concept...

From Pres. Gordon B. Hinckley-

Fill your Lives with Love and Happiness...

"Look about you... you are doing good, great good. Keep it up and rejoice in the Lord for the opportunity. Pray and walk uprightly before the Lord and He will bless you. ...Be Happy...
All of us have problems. We face them every day. How grateful I am that we have difficult things to wrestle with. The keep us young, if that is possible. They keep us alive. They keep us going. They keep us humble. They pull us down to our knees to ask God of Heaven for help in solving them. Be grateful for your problems, and know that somehow there will come a solution. Just do the best you can, but be sure it is your very best. Then leave it in the hands of the Lord."

Life is good! Might as well enjoy it...

P.S. I still need to play around with publishing fotos so they work how I'd like... but this works!